Saturday afternoon I slid from inner joy to utter funk, and realized how I created the funk even as I continued to slide further into it.  Ulysses had put forth two things to do in order to perceive the possible benefits of taking the red pill of the Tango Matrix.  As I did these two things, I created a radiance and calm within myself, and my resulting inner attitude fed my Tango bliss.

However, as I had re-occurring negative thoughts during Saturday’s alternative milonga, I found my negative thoughts corrupting my focus on Ulysses’s proposed actions.  As the festival continued, I still enjoyed many dances and found myself letting go into Tango songs and arms of such wonderful tangueras.  Nevertheless, an underground current of dissatisfaction pulled incessantly at my Tango bliss when I did not dance for awhile.

In spite of the underground current of dissatisfaction, I experienced many highlights that I will remember for a long while.  Two Tangueras in particular had me consistently floating on the milonga floor with precision, grace, fun, ease and bliss.  I danced 4+ tandas each milonga with them, and marveled at our connection, embrace, and efficient blissful movement.  After each tanda, I knew that if I smoked, I would have had a smoke.  We moved as one, and always had this supremely delicious look and feel after each song.

Kristine Goodwin & Dave Donatiu in Tango Bliss -- Photo by Young B. Kim

I had other Tandas where I experienced the same floating, though it was not consistent with all songs with the same tanguera.  I call attention to this floating experience as evidence of the rewards of all that I have gone through to get to the point where I consistently enter in Tango trances.  The floating is certainly a state of flow and is my experience of the Kiss of the Divine.  All in all I am so grateful for so many of the tandas I had the chance to experience.

Other aspects of the festival captured my attention.  I could not ask everyone I wanted to dance with for many reasons – not enough time, not the right music, another tanguera enchanted me with her cabaceo, I needed a break every now and then.  Also, I noticed how adorable and beautiful so many tangueras are – just bewitching.

In addition, I perceived that at some other festivals I have attended, a greater percentage of younger people (20-30 years of age) are present – why?  Furthermore, I noticed how navigational skills can make a dance so much easier and better – those leads with less experience often mentioned how they did not like nor have good dances when it was crowded, while better leads had great dances no matter how crowded it was.

Overall, I experienced the most Tango bliss ever at this festival, danced the best I ever have, and took the best care of my Self so my recovery was swift and easy.

Most importantly, I glimpsed the benefits of taking the red pill.  As a watcher of my own experience with Ulysses’s proposal, I witnessed a disturbing but exciting partial unveiling of meaning and explanation to mystery in Tango and my life.  Some may say Tango is just a dance – I believe these people have taken the blue pill.

Do I take the red pill?  I am conversing with Ulysses to find out more of the Tango Matrix…