A World of Magic as I envision it captured in an artistic rendering of the Aurora Borealis -by Frederic Edwin Church

I reached a pinnacle of negativity after experiencing and witnessing many repelling behaviors at the Stone Soup Tango Festival in Eugene, OR at the start of May 2009.   In my frustration I called out for help.  Friends & foes answered and tried to explain.  However, one man appeared that offered more than just explanation.  Ulysses (pseudonym), an enigmatic man of Tango and life wisdom, has guided and continues to guide me through Argentine Tango and my life path.

This entry is a recap and retrospective before taking the red pill of my personal illuminating and penetrating journey into what I now call- A WORLD OF MAGIC – the IMMENSE and BOUNDLESS energetic interaction of life.

Part 1- Red Pill?

In my frustration over many negative experiences in Tango, I shared with Ulyssess how I sensed a hidden stream of information that could fully account for what I had witnessed, experienced and heard in Tango as well as explain several experiences in my personal life.  Then Ulysses threatened and unraveled my Tango world by presenting me with the choice of a red pill or blue pill – inferring that a Tango Matrix existed.

At this point I did not believe a Tango Matrix existed.  However, Ulysses had become my Morpheus of the Tango Matrix.

Part 2- Deeper Truth

I questioned if a Tango Matrix existed, and if so, did I want to swallow the red or blue pill.   Ulysses led me to believe that knowing more of what really goes on in Tango offers fierce realizations that could eliminate a large portion of joy from Tango.  Historically, I have gone for deeper truth in several areas of life.  I explain what deeper truth is, and I asked Ulysses to help me get a glimpse of the benefits of finding deeper truth in Tango through taking the red pill.  He proposed:  “At your upcoming festival do these two things, and open your eyes to what you see.”

These two behaviors were to simply be kind and confident, with both myself and others.

Denver Tango Festival Day 1- Community Day 2-4- Floating

I shared some of my experiences during the Denver Tango Festival.

I did the two things Ulysses proposed, and saw with a good measure of disbelief, how big of a difference the two behaviors made.  I had had the best festival experience up to that point, and I fathomed the Tango Matrix could be real.

Part 3- Neo’s Incessant Inkling

Ulysses gave further credence to the existence of the Tango Matrix.  I believed that swallowing the red pill would thrust upon me a radically different way of believing, acting, being and envisioning in my life.  In a longer communication with Ulysses, he detailed what it would take to swallow the red pill.  The last two items he detailed were by far the hardest to do:

1. you must have absolute faith (different than religion) as it is the power of personal creation
2. you must absolutely trust that life energy/ Universe is not neutral, but conspires to assist and compel you to be better at ALL times

I am still coming to grips with these last two items as they have become integral in getting to know the world of MAGIC

Part 4- Cubic Centimeter of Chance

I realized a cubic centimeter of chance would soon come my way – a reference to Don Juan’s wisdom in a Carlos Castenada’s book.  In my words a cubic centimeter of chance is:  a portal to vast life change that opens but for a short time, and once you step through this portal, your life immediately executes a profoundly different beneficial trajectory.

In looking back, my cubic centimeter of chance presented itself with Katherine and her call to me for an umbrella Tango dance, and my choice to join her or not!

Part 5- Blue Pill

For years a phenomena in Tango has yanked me to disturbing confirmations, time and again.  I refer to this phenomena of when Tango enthusiasts grow dissatisfied with Tango and eventually quit.  I wonder how often how one deals with their dissatisfactions in Tango is akin to dealing with their dissatisfactions in life?  How often is giving up on Tango similar to taking the blue pill?

The blue pill repelled me, so I looked for a way in (take the red pill).  In getting a closer look of what the blue pill offered, I finally believed the Tango Matrix had existed all along.

“Deeper Truth” of Argentine Language and Tango Illusions

I looked at a bit of satire to get a deeper understanding of how Argentine culture influences Tango.  Within this satire is deeper truth sprinkled throughout.  I also recalled my own observations of what appeared real but was not.

I sought to apprehend benefits in taking the red pill.  I deciphered benefits as I understood reasons underlying behaviors in Milongas and Festivals concerning: cabaceo; snobbery; pecking order; value assigned to leads and follows; selection criteria for choosing teachers; masculine and feminine roles and how they relate to lead and follow roles.  As I became quite repelled in the face of certain behaviors, I decided I would swallow the red pill during my 2 1/2 week trip in my RV to two festivals- Salt Lake City Tango Festival and SFTX (San Francisco Tango Exchange).

Salt Lake City Tango Festival Day 1- Tango Crucible

Within 2 minutes of stepping onto the dance floor of the first milonga of Salt Lake City’s Tango Festival, I found myself in a Tango crucible, incredulous at the speed of entrance.  I intended to go deeper in action with Ulysses’ sage words by being confident and kind to myself, but instead dropped into the pit of my abdomen with a wrenching knotted-up ball of emotions – Tango meltdown!

I knew what I had to do to swallow the red pill and tried, but could not that first night of the festival.  It seemed as if the Universe tested and taunted me – saying I could not have the red pill.  However, the turning point of this journey took place on a lazy rainy Sunday afternoon at Sugar House Park in Salt Lake City with my first Umbrella Tango, and a cubic centimeter of chance…